My Battle With The bulge

I grew up skinny in fact I was just 47 kgs when I was in University but then life changed I left home went abroad then joined my parents in Egypt and when I reached the age of 25 my single life took the Bridget Jones Diary effect and as I was singing” All by Myself” out came chocolates, crisps and coke then by the time I was 26 I was 55 kgs as I was still single at 27 I became 65kgs still singing ” All By myself” Then I married a wonderful man at 28 I became 55 kgs for the wedding but I married a man who loves my cooking and I must admit I am a good cook and then I gave birth to this gorgeous baby girl now my weight is 75kgs. My goal weight is 47 kgs I may never be that weight but my hope is to try to be that weight so instead on rolling along with my pram I can walk and be that coveted yummy mummy that Gok has made so popular.So now I am singing” Ive got rhythm Ive got music Ive got my man I just want this weight of me” So this is my challenge within the next 4 months I hope to be 47 kgs will I achieve it I dont know but I will never know till I try. So counting points from weight watchers and exercising is my journey for this weight loss. Wish me luck

A poem dedicated to my grand mother the mother of my mother Mrs Ranjitham Jeyaraj

She was warm, loving and caring

Her love and sweetness with others sharing

Her simplicity and gentleness endearing

She never asked always gave

Gave of herself to her husband and children

Raising up her children, grand children and great grand children to be strong, intelligent, capable women and men,

Love was her first name,

Humility her second

One day the God Almighty decided to come down and pick a diamond of a man or a woman to place in His splendorous palace,

He picked my grand mother a woman of love, charm and grace

A Poem About “Us”

Our Wedding Day

He came into my life one beautiful October,
We dated all through November,
We were a couple, who people would remember,
He was tall and Caucasian and I was short and Indian,
It was love at first sight and he asked me to marry him within a month in December,
Much to my delight and that kiss after he put that ring that to my finger did cling was an evening to remember.
It was now or never,
When we spoke our vows it was forever,
He turned out to be a caring husband and lover,
I turned out to be great cook and soon to be  mother,
We are both different yet similar,
Love crosses boundaries, races, discrimination and racism erases,
I love his spiky dark brown hair.
He has a flair in combing my long black tresses.
Our customs,  habits, and dresses different
Yet our difference the other pleases,
Integration into society of another culture is a process that needs a Moses.
With each one taking the hand of the other as we travel over land and water.
We have been and lived in each others lands as compatible as holding hands.
We may be complexion shades apart, but our love for the other will never depart.
As we made a covenant between each other in front of man and God,
We are a union and till our life ebbs away we will share sweet communion,
With God and man as husband and wife, till everlasting life.
Keeping away from all anger and strife
And darling thank you for making me your wife.

Unity In The Body Of Christ

As I watched the sunrise the other day and waved good bye to my husband at the door as he left for work. I was holding my coffee in my hands just amazed at the magnitude of the splendour and majesty of God. I just could not help praising God and wanting to remember this special scene I took a picture on my mobile phone.

This awesome awe inspiring God, creator of the universe, the world, peoples and nations. So vast is his creation yet He cares for a speck of sand like me if a satellite photo was taken of the earth I would be even smaller.

He cares about my dreams, ambitions, failures and successes, He has been with me through them all and has helped me come out the other side stronger as an individual and stronger in Him.

This world is going through birth pangs and so am I soon. As the world is waiting for the Son of God to be revealed, I am waiting for my baby to be born. Similar to the travail of a woman is this world pregnant with expectation for some explosive revival.

We have seen the revival days of Amy McPherson, Kathryn Khulman ,Oral Roberts and many more. There is a struggle between good and evil but I know and believe that good will prevail.

God’s word is light, this metamorphosis or pregnant period of the world is going to either make or break the Christian community. I pray it makes the Christian community stronger, firmer and more on fire for the Lord.

We know too much from the dark side and some like me have even participated in it but thank the Almighty God who forgives our sins if we confess and forsake them for good.

So instead of bickering about religious doctrine, Christian brother rising up against Christian brother on religious gossip and whose got the bigger house? Let us come together as one body in Christ crying out to Him for revival and a new oneness and unity in the body of Christ.

God says in His word those who are not against me and my teaching are for me. Let us come together as one not to save the environment  which the world is already doing but to save the world from darkness, filth and disunity in the body of Christ.

Let us be as innocent as doves to filth that pervades our televisions and movie houses but let us come closer to God and to our brothers and sisters in Christ. Instead of telling the government to check God’s people’s bank accounts, check your own life are you perfect as Jesus? Even Jesus in all his humility said no one is good except God.

So let us stop fighting and let us stand as one body, one bride in unity for her Heavenly  Bridegroom. The Spirit and the bride say come.

A hypothetical discussion between a Messianic Jew and a Pentecostal Irish Belfast Bible College graduate regarding their views on the Old and New testaments of the Bible

“In the beginning was the Word and the Word was with God and the Word was God. He was with God in the beginning” John 1:1,2

Before time ever existed one thing existed and that was the Word. Jesus was the Word made flesh and dwelt among us. Before time existed Jesus existed therefore logically speaking the Word made flesh which is Jesus existed before time existed.

The play unfolds:-

There are two very important people I would like to introduce to you. One is Methuselah middle aged with salt and pepper hair, a big moustache and a bigger tummy with five children four girls and one boy and a wife named Hannah. Names of children are Sarah, Rebecca, Rachel, Abigail and a son named Isaac. Methuselah has recently come to accept Jesus as Lord and Saviour and so has his family they are Messianic Jews who have come to Northern Ireland on holiday.

My next friend is Paul, who likes to think of himself as apostle Paul because of the prophesies he has received from his Pentecostal brothers and sisters from the Elim Pentecostal Church. He is six feet tall, blue/grey eyes with glasses, very thin and scanty blond hair. He is in his late thirty’s. Paul is single and has a Bachelor’s degree in theology from Belfast Bible College. He is hoping to go to Israel as a missionary. Paul met Methuselah in Jerusalem when he went there on holiday and is hoping to get to know Sarah as a prospective bride. Paul and Methuselah have arranged to meet for coffee at Star bucks.

Their conversation begins :-

Meths:- Shalom Paul ( gives Paul a warm hug)

Paul:- Praise the Lord brother and stretches out his hand to shake hands but is overwhelmed by Methuselah’s big hug.

Meths:- How are you Paul? When are you planning on coming to Israel, the land flowing with milk and honey as Psalms 48:1,2 says “ Great is the Lord and greatly to be praised. In the city of our God. In His holy mountain beautiful elevation.  The joy of the whole earth is mount Zion on the sides of the North. The city of the great King.”

Paul:- Can’t imagine why God would send Jesus to that wee little land to fulfil his purpose in all the earth. He could have come to Northern Ireland ya know it is so green and welcoming, ya know man I am not patriotic but why the Middle East?

Meths:- Laughs out loud Oye ,Oye ,Oye, now you want to turn Jesus Irish. Jesus was born in a manger in Bethlehem in that wee little land of Israel, through Him all the nations of the earth will be blessed as it says in Luke 2:30-32 “ For mine eyes have seen your salvation, which you have prepared before all the peoples. A light to bring revelation to the Gentiles and the glory to your people Israel.”

Paul:-Jesus is all that matters, once we have Jesus who came to save the world from sin and sickness and we thankfully, glory to God, do not need the law. As Martin Luther says (Ahem clears his throat and puts on his most important look) We are saved by grace and  not by the law.

(Just then a beautiful blond waitress comes up to take their order, Paul adjusts his glasses and stares at the waitress unable to speak.) So Methuselah gives the orders of two cappuccinos. Paul keeps staring at the waitress till she goes back.

Meths:-Paul you might as well hang a sign around your neck that says ’single and looking intently’. Now coming back to what you said about the law, A.G. Herbert in his book ‘The Authority of the Old Testament says “ it is never said that the Mosaic law is now seen not to have been the law of God at all, on the contrary it is God’s law and it is holy and righteous and good. It is never said that the prophets are right and the law wrong, nor is the moral law endorsed and the ceremonial law repudiated, on the contrary Jesus has come not to destroy but to fulfil both the law and the prophets.”

Paul:- That’s good, Aha, Jesus never came to die for our sins in  the Old Testament. In the Old Testament they had sacrifices ,the Mosaic law and of course the prophets. But I says I like the apostles filled with the Holy Spirit doing signs and wonders in Jesus’ name.

Meths:- ( shakes his head) My dear boy let me take you through a journey back to the time of prophets and prophesies and how the Holy Spirit worked in the Old Testament. The prophets filled with the Holy Spirit played a very significant role in the life of the Jewish people and therefore in our lives as well. As I said earlier Jesus is the fulfilment of the Law that was prophetic. Now let me take you to I Samuel 16:13 ( Methuselah takes out his Bible from his brown brief case) ‘Samuel took the horn of oil and anointed him in the midst of his brothers and the Spirit of the Lord came upon David from that day forward.’ How did David kill the Lion and the bear 1 Samuel 17:49 ? The answer is simple dear boy because the Holy Spirit was on David. In the Old Testament the Holy Spirit was not a free gift to all people only a chosen few were filled with the Holy Spirit and they were the Prophets, Priests, and Kings. The moment Samuel anointed David with oil, David had a change in perspective from David the Shepherd boy to David the King. Now lets go to your favourite part of scripture Luke 3:22 ” And the Holy Spirit descended in bodily form like a dove upon him and a voice from Heaven which said “ You are my beloved Son; in you I am well pleased”.  From that significant moment in Jesus’ life, Jesus had the ability to work miracles and now this is my point dear boy, which portion of scripture did Jesus read at the synagogue in Nazareth after being endowed with power from on high?  He read Isaiah 61:1,2 and if the Old Testament was just the Law and Jesus just came to give us amazing grace why would He read Isaiah 61:1,2 ? A prophecy concerning Himself. Now lets go to Zechariah 9:9 “Rejoice greatly O daughter of Zion, Shout daughter of Jerusalem, See your King comes to you righteous and having salvation gentle and riding on a donkey on a colt, The foal of a donkey.” This prophecy was fulfilled in Matthew 21:7,8 where Jesus sat on the donkey as He approached Jerusalem and the crowds lay their cloaks before Him on the road and Jesus entered Jerusalem riding on the donkey just as the law had foretold. Jesus fulfilled the law and the law was prophetic. Therefore dear son you cannot have the new without the old. Like two sides of a coin ( as Methuselah flicks a coin in the air and catches it)

Paul:- Sips his cappuccino, looks at the young couple who have just entered Star bucks and gives a gives a big sigh. He pauses for a moment, takes a big gulp of cappuccino and chokes as it is really hot, he gulps a mouthful of cold water wipes his eyes, puts his glasses back on and continues. According to J P Fokkelman in his book Reading Biblical Narrative

“ The narrative art of the New Testament can be found in the four gospels and the Acts of the Apostles. These books have been written in the Greek of the Hellenistic world of the first century. All of them move around two land marks, Firstly the person of Jesus Christ and secondly the group of texts that for Jesus, His disciples and the writers of the gospels and the letters constitute the Holy scriptures, The Hebrew Bible. Paradoxically, we can  only speak of the Old Testament after a New Testament has been written and recognised as a canon.

Meths:- Dear boy, what are you trying to prove? We had the law first Exodus 20 :1-17, the prophesies, example Isaiah 61:1-3 and Isaiah 53. The Old Testament foreshadowed the New. The Old Testament was the foundation on which the New Testament was built. The New Testament is a prophetic fulfilment of the Old Testament. Jesus is the Word made flesh who paid the ultimate sacrifice for our sins to fulfil the law and the prophets. Now coming back to a more personal level, You remember the time Rebecca was sick with typhoid I just prayed the Psalms with tears especially Psalm 42. ‘Tears have been my food’ when we did not have enough food in the house for our children to eat but by praying and fasting ( not optionally) God took us through that time when we were in Russia and brought us to the promised land of Jerusalem. Those prayers from the Old Testament worked and now we are here in Northern Ireland on holiday drinking Cappuccino.

Paul:- Takes of his glasses and wipes the tears from his eyes and blows his nose loudly on the Star Bucks serviette. Well Methuselah, it is great having you in Noren Ireian…. I agree with you dear  brother that we need the Old Testament to have the New Testament,

Let us pray, Paul clears his throat and prays with the loud voice that people turn around and stare “ Dear God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, Thank you for the privilege of knowing Yahweh, Emmanuel God with us and at the same time have the sweet communion with the Holy Spirit. He then pauses and says God give me a wife soon, with a hint to Methuselah, adds someone from the Holy land he again pauses and says in the words of the song  by Keith Christianson  “ We believe in the Father, who created all that is and we believe the universe and all there is is His. As a loving heavenly Father, He yearned to save us all to lift us from the fall we believe. We believe in Jesus the Father’s only son existing  before time had begun a sacrifice for sin, He died and rose again to ransom sinful men we believe. We believe in the Spirit who makes believers one, our hearts are filled with His presence the Comforter has come. The kingdom unfolds in His plan, unhindered by quarrels of man His church upheld by his hand we believe. Though the earth be removed and time be no more these truths are secure, God’s word shall endure whatever may change these things are sure we believe. So if the mountains are cast  down into the plains when Kingdoms all crumble this one remains, Our faith is not subject to seasons of man with our fathers we proclaim. We believe our Lord will come as He said, The land and the sea will give up their dead His children will reign with Him as their head, we believe, we believe.

Amen

Bibliography

1.Herbert A. G. The Authority of the Old Testament, Faber and Faber Ltd

2.Fokkelman J.P Reading Biblical Narrative, An Introductory Guide, John Knox Press 1995

3.Walter C Kaiser Jr. The Old Testament Documents, Inter varsity press 2001

4. Harrison RK Introduction to the Old Testament , The Tyndale Press 1969

Princess

In the land of far far away, where waters divide nations, peoples  and cultures, a land which was renowned for precious stones, spices, art and architecture, where dancing beauties graced the temple courts.

In such a land called the sub- continent of India I was born. I was born into a privileged society and I was a class above the rest of my brothers and sisters  of India because firstly I belonged to the warrior caste secondly I was going to be a Maharani or Queen.images-1

I was a princess, my karma or life cycle could not have been better. I must have been exceptionally good in my former life as well. I was born with a golden spoon in my mouth my parents were relieved I was born after waiting many years for children.

I learnt to sing Indian classical music, play the sitar or the Indian harp. learnt mathematics, science, English and history the subject I was born into. My singing was very good and my teacher playing the harmonium, which is an instrument like an organ that one plays sitting on the ground, and teaching me the Carnatic music scales was very encouraging, I loved to sing, it let me feel the power of one’s soul merge with creation.

I also learnt Indian Classical dance called Bharatanatayam and with silver bells on my anklets beating to the rhythm of my dance teacher’s counting. She said my big brown eyes could tease and tantalise to the song of my dance telling stories with my expression and my eyes.

I had two maids of my own who chose the choicest silk  attire for me, they braided my hair with jewels and flowers and put  kajal or eye make, powdered my face and decked me with jewellery. I loved it all but I was lonely. I studied my ancient religious books called the Ramayana and Mahabharata.

I was bright and I wanted to learn more and more as I loved knowledge and asked my tutors many questions , especially my English tutor who was a teacher from London. Her name was Margaret, unusual name I thought till she told me it meant a Pearl and she was a rare pearl. She taught me to read and write English, she also taught me British history and above all religion. Everything about Britain fascinated me, intrigued me and filled my imagination with the most wondrous thoughts.

My father, the Maharaja, wanted me to marry once I turned eighteen but I wanted to study in London. I was born in 1901 and the British had colonised India. My father, the Maharaja, had good ties with the British hierarchy.

images-2The year I turned fifteen I felt my life was going to change, it was then He walked into my life, a young Captain called John Edward. He was twenty one years old, with dark brown hair, piercing blue eyes six feet tall, with a beard and moustache. He took my breath away the moment he walked through the Palace doors. He was going to be my geography tutor. He was an aristocrat and he began to teach me about the western world, how to read maps and told me about New York in America with its high buildings and the Grand Canyon. I was taking it all in, as he showed me the pictures it was like going through those breathtaking lands.

We started talking for hours. I asked him some of the most ridiculous questions like how do the people climb so many steps to go to the top or how did they build that high being a novice to modern technology. He just shook his head and laughed out loud He just said there are machines called cranes and lifts to take you right on top of the buildings.

We spent time studying in the study, the gardens and the courtyard. One day while we were walking I slipped and his hands held my waist I was sixteen now and we looked into each other’s eyes for a long time. I saw his ears go red and he whispered softly ‘I am in love with you my beautiful question asking princess’. My heart beat fast I lifted my hand and pushed the hair back from his brow and just when we were about to kiss my maid came hurriedly carrying a big tray saying she had brought us some Indian sweets and tea from the kitchen. We were a bit distracted, it was horrible timing, we were still a bit shy thinking of what could have happened. We somehow relaxed and enjoyed the Indian sweets and tea.

We spent more time together walking in the gardens holding hands, till one day he said he could not hold his feelings in any longer and he kissed me. It was passionate, then tender then sweet. He touched the flowers in my hair, my back, my waist and I melted in his arms.

It was the most incredible feeling I had ever felt, I was exhilarated and on December 15 1917 I had my first kiss among the rose gardens.images

We were inseparable, my father, the  Maharaja, took notice and told me to stop going out with a low caste white man. I told him John was aristocratic  and my father just said ” he eats meat especially that of the sacred cow”. “Can you imagine anyone eating the meat of a holy cow”.

I told my father I will marry John and no one else. John wanted to show me America, London and told me about Western fashions and hats with feathers that the women wore. He told about life in Oxford University and I decided I wanted to study psychology. So much against my parents wishes, I was engaged to Captain John Edward. I wore a bright red saree with all kinds of jewels in my ears and around my neck, in my hair, on my arms and feet and around my waist. I also had my hair up instead of a braid, with jasmine flowers and I sat on an elephant. John sat on the opposite elephant and they had the drums and the bands playing festive songs, it was an exhilarating night to remember.

John’s parents looked happy and John’s mother wore a blue saree that matched her blue eyes. My father, the Maharaja, relaxed when he found out John’s father was a  top business man in London and descended from aristocracy. It was then that I announced I wanted to study at Oxford after marriage.

My father said he could never stop me asking questions as a child and he pitied my tutors and that is why he hired tutors. John and I were married in two months. For the first time in my life I left India going by a ship called St. Elizabeth to London.

We had our honeymoon on the ship and when we reached the shores of London we were greeted by John’s two sisters Pricilla and Liza who welcomed me warmly. We got along very well, I was still in my saree and shawl and the carriage was waiting for us.

It was then John’s sisters and I decided I needed a make over. The next day they took me out to buy me some long dresses, some hats with feathers, some gloves and they even  got me my own personal hairdresser. I got my self some riding trousers and boots and started riding everyday on a beautiful mild spirited mare called Starlight. If only my father, the Maharaja, could see me in these clothes.

It was then time for university, I was excited I integrated well into the university culture and studied my favourite subject psychology. I was intrigued at how the  human brain functions and works and about different personality traits in people of different cultures.

We also took a holiday to New York, I was amazed at the tall buildings and lifts. We had a press meeting it was remarkable. At last I saw the places of my imagination and I turned all my energies in studying ball room dancing, holding parties and becoming a western woman of culture.

I never forgot who I was or where I came from but what spurred me on was the love of one British captain with blue eyes and dark hair who had shown me to dream and now I was living that dream. I love you, John Edward.

A Christian Journey

As I take a journey on life’s road

I look back at the steps I have trod

In my hands I carry a heavy load

As I gaze towards the crossroads

I see a sign called introspection

I look back at my hands with a heavy load

And deep within comes a cry of condemnation

I journey on wondering why was I ever born

Can’t anyone hear me,

Why am I all alone

Till I see another sign called justification

Intrigued with curiosity

Longing for divine sanctity

Seeking to be clothed in chastity

I enter this narrow road of justification

Till I reach that powerful light

Oh, what an awesome sight

I feel the omnipotent presence of sweet delight

I run urged by this omnipotent presence

Leading me on till I reach a cross

And look for me what He has done

I look down eyes and heart full of condemnation

Till I hear the omnipotent presence whisper deep within

Saying daughter today is the day of redemption

I feel the divine presence merge into mine

His presence all the evil from me refine

Into that omnipotent presence I could submerge

Suddenly I look up and find myself alone

Yet not alone

I feel the serenity of that omnipotent divinity

I feel clothed in a canopy of chastity

I walk back to that wide road of introspection

I no longer feel the grip of condemnation

Cause my spirit has attained justification

That precious blood on the cross

A libation for my sinful soul brought me redemption

I take another route now

A road called sanctification

Urged by the divine omnipotent presence

The gospel I make proclamation,

Till I reach the divine ordination

When my soul to heaven takes the journey of ascension